Call Me (1-800-TOLDYOU)

Call Me (1-800-TOLDYOU), acrylic on canvas, 16" x 20"
Available from Latin Pop Shop.

Farrah's Glamour Center

What 70's/80's girl (and many a boy) didn't want to play with one of these?

Farrah's Glamour Center, acrylic and ink on canvas, 11" x 14"
Order yours HERE!

The Art Monkeys on Fox 5 Morning News

Complicated Crush

Lynda Carter was my first TV crush.
I didn't know whether I wanted to marry or be her.


Complicated Crush
mixed media on canvas
24" x 30" x 1 1/2"
Available from my studio or Etsy Store.

Celebrity Flash: Interview With Mike Ruiz

Read my interview with world-renowned photographer Mike Ruiz on Huffington Post!

Echa 'Palante!

Read my interview with RuPaul's Drag Race contestant, Yara Sofia on Huffington Post.

The Little Drag Queen That Could: Shangela

Read my interview with RuPaul's Drag Race contestant, Shangela on Huffington Post.

Step Into Her World: Carmen Carrera

And then there were five.

Read my interview with Carmen Carrera on The Huffinton Post.

RuPaul's Drag Race airs Monday nights on Logo. Stay tuned for my weekly interviews with the remaining finalists as well as with Drag Race's outspoken judge, Michelle Visage.

Random Thoughts About The Grammys

Here are some random thoughts I jotted down during last night's telecast:

-'RETHA's Tribute. WAY Too long. Xtina with the different color mic stand. Really?? Get off it already, chubby.

Has Jen Hudson been sending her all the food she stopped eating or what??

Florence was the best part of this tribute.

And how about cutting that shit a bit and giving Lady T deserved respect instead of a half-sec shot in the middle during the In Memoriam...and not even give her the fuckin screen to herself. That was some serious bullshit.

-Ricky Martin...first wtf was up with those pants??? Secondly, yes you're gay YAY! Just 'cause you finally came out you don't now have to do EVERYTHING that's gay.

-Gaga...fuck it Gaga, kill 'em if they hate you. Just kill them all. Love the song and the performance was fun. I don't care if it sounds like Express Yourself (I honestly don't hear it that much) or Itsy Bitsy Spider, so the fuck what. Lavaux sounds like Automatic, Fergalicious sounds like Supersonic, Strong Enough sounds like I Will Survive and...

-Janelle Monae, I LOVE YOU!!!

-Justin Bieber and Ben (Usher) Vereen, I hate u both. THANK GAWD I'd accumulated enough on my dvr to skip both your asses.

-Bob Dylan and 28 Hillbillies...I wanted to kill myself 30 seconds into that whole thing. Holy shit, you couldn't understand this dude before. Was that just static coming out his mouth??

-Why does Lady Antebellum always make me think of a fab hag going out with her two favorite gays? She is too cute.

-Ceelo KA-MF-KAWWWWWWWW! Best of the night. And Gwenneth's shoes!!!

I enjoyed the show, overall, but I felt like I hardly saw folk going up to get awards. Exactly how many had been awarded beforehand? Wow.

I read something about some reporter having a stroke at the Grammys.

I blame this:


I thought I was having a stroke too but it just turned out to be bad fashion.

My TV Debut!

Ok, so that's going a bit far...but I will be watching Gary and Tony Have a Baby on CNN tonight and not just because if you look on the upper right corner of this clip you will spot an original Batman and Robin "SIGH!" painting by Yours Truly.

Start Your Engines!

Yes, honey! Ms. RuPaul is BACK!

So the first episode of Season 2 aired tonight (as well as the follow up RuPaul's Drag Race: Untucked, which I'm loving and is very MODELS OF THE RUNWAY...HELLO!). I am in GAY heaven!

Random thoughts, Episode One:

Dear Nicole Paige Brooks, I do not know how they do in Atlanta GA today, February 1st 2010, but RuRu and Lady Bunny are both products of your hometown so there is true fabulousity to be had there. PUT SOME GOTDAMNED STOCKINGS ON THEM TWIGGY-ASS LEGS. Be a lady for half a second, Lawd. I am an old fashioned queen. I believe in the Power of Hosiery.

Raven is this years Shannel. I'm not havin the piercings as a girl though.

Cutest Boys: Raven, Sahara and Pandora (yes, adorable geeky-cuteness).

Slap You 'cross Yo Face BEAU-TAY: Tyra Sanchez and Tatianna... followed closely by Raven.

Bitch Just Celebrate Yo Shit and Drop the Negativity: Mystique

Dear Ms. Morgan, There is a fierceness about you, no doubt, but I am still on the fence. Congrats on the costume win, but I will never be a fan of bare midriffs. Not when we're trying to sell WOMAN, honey. You're a boy, with boyish hips and a boyish tummy tum tum. Your face was ON, I'll give you this.

And Ms. Morgan, I was with you when you stepped it up to Mystique. HowsomeEVER, if that bitch puts her weight into it you are bye-bye G-O-N-E. I celebrate your courage.

Project Runway Finale: Pt 2

Well, it's a wrap.
Another season of Project Runway has come to a close.
Irina was named winner, deservedly so. While I was rooting for Carol Hannah, neither hers nor Althea's collections could really hold a candle to Meana-Irina's parade of warrior women.
She did not only take home the prize on showmanship (or show-woman-ship), but on the details as well.
Did I not gush over those knits and hats last week???

Best Finale Moment:
Nina questions Irina about the lack of color in her collection and follows it up with an ever-so-bitchy and slightly annoyed: "We talked about this."

New season starts in January! YAY!

Project Runway Finale: Part 1

I'm rootin for Carol Hannah, but I have to admit, conceited, pretentious and over-confident or not some of Irina's pieces (especially those huge criss-cross knits) looked DEEEvine.
And the little hats!!! Oh, the little hats!

This Carol Hannah design got a lot of air time last night. I do like it a lot, though I wish the top of the skirt was trimmed down a bit. Still, I can't wait to see it fully styled and on the runway. I'm sure Lisa will work the hell out of it!

What Irina lacks in personality she certainly makes up for in talent. I mean,her clothes actually make Kalyn look like she can model something outside of a mall. She really is the one to beat.
You know, for all of Irina's Lush edginess, it really surprises me that she is so loyal to Kalyn and her suburban cheerleader-wholesome-sorority-sister look. I just don't see an ounce of high fashion in this girl's look. She does have tremendous UPN show star quality, however.

Did I mention the hats? ...oh the hats!

Speaking of Kalyn OMFG DID YOU SEE HER MOTHER on Models??!
I don't think I've ever seen a mother and daughter look SO much alike. Mama Kalyn's blunt bob positively SCREAMED rich bitch (in a good way).

Mama Kalyn shows Jr. how bitchy is done. PAY ATTENTION...and get Mommy another glass of bubbly!!!

The biggest surprise to me will be if Althea takes home the prize. Though one never knows. I feel like we saw less of her collection last night, than either of the other designers, and maybe that could be a hint that they don't want to give any of it away until the finale. We shall see.
I do think that Tanisha's career will probably explode after this (probably already happening).
I can't wait to see her stomp down that Bryant Park runway.

This season has offered up some of the best models of any Project Runway season.

Celine, Tanisha (who's almost too gorgeous for words), Lisa and of course, my favorite (and still missed ) Kojii.

All in all it's been a good season and I've almost gotten over having to post pics in my blog that have myLifetime.com written on them.

Farewell Kojii

Yes, a lot happened on Project Runway this week, but it all pales in comparison to my Kojii not being picked to model on the show again. She was the one and only!
Enjoy these fierce photos of her whilst I grieve.

The Glamorous Life

Yay for glamour!!!
This week's Project Runway challenge was all about things that glitter. The challenge, announced by the King of Hollywood Glamour, the legendary Mr. Bob Macke, was to create a stage look for none other than Mousketeer turned Skank turned Glamorous Swan, Christina Aguilera.

Carol Hannah used the opportunity to stretch and experiment within a style that was foreign to her. She did not disappoint, creating a Va-Va-Voom! Old Hollywood-style gown in black sequins and feathers. She kept it fresh by playing with texture. The result was sexy and sophisticated. Smart girl.

FAB!

Nicolas gave us a very sexy number in white sequins/beads and feathers. Unfortunately it didn't seem to vary enough from some of his previous work.

The duds this week came courtesy of Shirin and Christopher.
As much as I love Christopher (well, looking at him, at least), it was he who deserved to be Aufed this week, not Shirin. Shirin's gown was a mess, but Christopher's "reveal" consisted of a cheap and droopy corset (if you could really even call it that) and a pathetic pair of NOT-hot pants. The entire thing screamed HOMEMADE.

Gichy, Gichy, Ya-Ya, EWWW!

On Models, Kojii keeps on rockin'!
Ebony was sent home. I'm glad. There is something wrong in the head with that girl.

True Blue

This week's Project Runway challenge was all about the color blue.
Well, almost all. It was also about designing looks for Macy's INC brand. This was a team challenge which meant the designers had to pair up.

When, as team leader, Christopher picked Epperson to be his partner I was sure they'd be the team to beat. Instead they created two completely disconnected looks which earned them one of the bottom slots. In all fairness, while the collar on Christopher's bubble top/dress was more than a bit bib-ish, it just did not seem to deserve quite the harsh critique it got. Michael Kors seemed hellbent on making up for lost time and really went to town on the would-be dream team. Who knew she could be such a sadist. All my Christopher fantasies went out the window when he let that Orange Bottom (Kors) reduce him to sobby girly tears.
I do love both Christopher and Epperson so I'm glad neither went home this week.

Louise vomited ruffles all over a poorly tailored dress and sent it down the runway. In turn, she was sent home. Afterward she stated that she'd gotten farther in the competition than she had expected. Well it's nice to know she was in it to maybe win it.

As seen on When Bridesmaids Attack!

Irina was the challenge winner. It was well deserved. Her dress was fresh and extremely wearable.

Irina's winning design.

On Models of the Runway, my girl Kojii is still in the race. Yay!

Lights, Camera, Design!

Project Runway took us to the movies this week, an improvement over last week challenge.
Designers had to choose a film genre and create (as well as dress, of course) a character to send down the runway.

No designer wanted the Western genre, but it was Epperson who delivered the design I would have given top honors to. His translation of Western was appropriate (we understood who the model was supposed to be) yet modern (his rough denim ruffles were divine!) and most importantly...entirely Epperson! You could look at that garment and tell immediately which of the designers it came from. Let's hope the poor man's luck for constantly being picked last translates to being one of the last standing.


BANG BANG!

Instead, the top prize of immunity went to Nicolas, who quite honestly bores me to tears. I am not sure what exactly the panel (still sans Nina and Ms. Kors) saw in it that wowed them so. It was really quite ordinary...as far as Ice Queens go.

Cutie Christopher delivered another impressive dress, this one fit for a Vampire Bride. He made a bold choice ignoring Tim's disapproval of going sleeveless with a Victorian gown. Christopher ultimately made the right choice, but Tim's call, of course was accurate. A good example of how the contestants occasionally receive mixed signals (mentoring vs. judging). Perhaps challenge guidelines should be more specific. Were the designs supposed to be true to their period (those who chose period) or were they to bend the rules and bring to life a vision merely inspired by a time and place?

In a shocking (at least to me) turn of events, Ra'mon was sent home after piecing together a last minute Hot Reptilian Mess. It seemed somewhat unfair to me that in a show where "Safe" is a dirty word, the failed, but imaginative above and beyond what it was being compared against, design lost to the "snoozefest". Ra'mon had a solid track record up until this challenge, and at this point in the competition (still a ways from top 5), that should have counted for something.


Hot Reptilian Mess.

The Client Is Not Always Right

This week's challenge was one we've seen before: Model as Client. This time, however, the outfits were intended to showcase the models at an industry event.
I wonder if by "industry event" they meant Heidi got her assistant to make some phone calls and see if the Ed Hardy folk wanted some free drinks that night.

Althea took top prize this week by outfitting her model (gorgeous and fierce cat-walker, Tanisha) in a 3 piece ensemble that was both chic and youthful.

As expected, some designers took too much direction from their models and lost their aesthetic in the process.

Johnny, for example, made his model Emarie look even more average than she already does.
Seriously, how did this girl get onto a modeling competition???
I know, that's awful and bitchy and one should not say things like that. But, really...
I'm sure she's a smart and lovely girl. I can see her working with children on some capacity.
There, I've said something nice to balance the not-so.

But it was Qrystl (or was it Krystl? or Xrystl?) who laid the biggest egg by not only averaging-down her model Valerie with a snoozefest of a dress, but by ageing her (according to Heidi) 10 to 15 years!
I found this to be particularly tragic considering that Valerie's looks are reminiscent of the beautiful Lynn Whitfield. Unfortunately she appears to be about the same age.
Ok, ok, I exaggerate! Valerie looks great!
...for a woman in her late 30's/early 40's. Not the "freshest" face the modeling industry has ever seen, is all I'm saying.


I should've tried out for She's Got The Look!

And so we bade farewell to Qrystl, whose aesthetic, quite honestly, always seemed a bit more Queens of Comedy than Haute Couture. Maybe the Queens will do a Reunion tour and call on her. We can all hope.

From Qrystl's Previous Work portfolio on Mylifetime.com:

If Kid Rock had a bridal line, I suspect it might look something like this.




Seriously. Did a Project Runway producer loose his damn mind??!
All this photo is missing is a pole and a lunch buffet in the background ('cause we're talking day-shift entertainment with this lovely ensemble).

We Interrupt This Project Runway Re-cap...

with a few words about this week's Models of the Runway:
Well DAMN if Fatma didn't go ahead and get her ass picked by the Vagina Monologues lady! HA!
She's a total bitch (or perhaps "misunderstood", tee-hee) but you gotta love that shit!

Evil Fatma


Vagina Monologues Lady Designer

If I was one of the designers I'd be fighting for Kojii (my personal favorite) or Celine!

Goddess Kojii


Gorgeous Celine

This week's Project Runway challenge was about surfing. Bo-ring! You wouldn't have Beach Blanket Project Runway had the show stayed put in NYC. Someone must have come to their senses so they threw in an avant-gard look into the mix of things. Because everyone knows surfing and avant-gard go hand in hand.

In the end Ra'mon was picked the winner (deservedly so) and Mitchell was sent packing, as expected. Wow...wasn't that exciting? Here's hoping for a better challenge next week!

Mamma Mia!

Tonight's challenge: Maternity.
The Muse: A glowing and super-preggo Rebecca Romijn.

This week I will concentrate on the tragedies of this particular challenge.
It never ceases to surprise me just how little some aspiring designers actually know about real women. As a contestant of Project Runway, how do you not know that this is a challenge that will eventually pop up? I mean, Come on! Heidi is only pregnant like every other season.

This week offered up some real doozies and left us pondering the age-old question:
What came first? The chicken or the bowling bag?
Ra'mon (no, not just plain Ramon, god-forbid!) sent the lovely purple and lavender bowling bag with legs down the runway. His reasoning being that he would design something for Ms. Romijn as if she weren't 15 months pregnant...except she's like on her 18th month. (twins will do it to ya everytime)

Gutterball!

Malvin...oh, sweet, soft-spoken Malvin. Where do I start?
Is it a pre-requisite that every design show have someone with fucked up hair whose every move is other-wordly, life changing and "conceptual"??? I'm sorry, but we've seen you before Malvin. You were James-Paul, just weeks ago, in Bravo's attempt at retaining their Project Runway audience, The Fashion Show. Actually, you were also kind of Johnny R. in that show as well.
My point being. Artsy-fartsy, bad hair and weird clothes a "designer" do not make.
Goofy designers like Galliano, Betsey Johnson and Vivienne Westwood, get away with their appearances because there is great substance and beauty in their clothes.
I don't quite know what to say about Malvin's concept. What about a very pregnant, very full and very beautiful Rebecca Romijn makes you say: I know! I'll dress her like a chicken! ?

I broke my belly and the doctor put it in a sling.
Does this model look happy???

Also on the chopping block was Mitchell, who should've had a clue his creation was headed down the wrong path when he was able to fit a contestant inside each leg of the shorts he was sewing.
Ra'mon was safe and hopefully learned a lesson about the female form and its various states.
In the end Mitchell stayed and Malvin was sent home.
I know that a lot of folk out there will probably say Malvin should have stayed on the basis (or beleif) that he was a true art-iste with deep philosophical ideas and "conceptual" designs.
But let me ask you this ladies: How many of you want to wear an ugly unflattering outfit with a deep (and I mean do deep, as in buried way way someplace in there) message you will most likely have to explain to everyone who points, giggles and whispers when you enter the room?

...Exactly. Ka-KAW!

I might not care for Mitchell's sloppiness, but the idea behind his design was accessible and current and actually kind of "hip". Had it been properly executed might have even landed him a top spot for the week.

In Mitchell's defense he thought this was also a Survivalist Challenge.
The shorts double as a tent.

PS. My favorite looks were Gordana's and Irina's.

LIZ LANGE, you've nothing to worry about!