Friday, August 28, 2009

Mamma Mia!

Tonight's challenge: Maternity.
The Muse: A glowing and super-preggo Rebecca Romijn.

This week I will concentrate on the tragedies of this particular challenge.
It never ceases to surprise me just how little some aspiring designers actually know about real women. As a contestant of Project Runway, how do you not know that this is a challenge that will eventually pop up? I mean, Come on! Heidi is only pregnant like every other season.

This week offered up some real doozies and left us pondering the age-old question:
What came first? The chicken or the bowling bag?
Ra'mon (no, not just plain Ramon, god-forbid!) sent the lovely purple and lavender bowling bag with legs down the runway. His reasoning being that he would design something for Ms. Romijn as if she weren't 15 months pregnant...except she's like on her 18th month. (twins will do it to ya everytime)

Gutterball!

Malvin...oh, sweet, soft-spoken Malvin. Where do I start?
Is it a pre-requisite that every design show have someone with fucked up hair whose every move is other-wordly, life changing and "conceptual"??? I'm sorry, but we've seen you before Malvin. You were James-Paul, just weeks ago, in Bravo's attempt at retaining their Project Runway audience, The Fashion Show. Actually, you were also kind of Johnny R. in that show as well.
My point being. Artsy-fartsy, bad hair and weird clothes a "designer" do not make.
Goofy designers like Galliano, Betsey Johnson and Vivienne Westwood, get away with their appearances because there is great substance and beauty in their clothes.
I don't quite know what to say about Malvin's concept. What about a very pregnant, very full and very beautiful Rebecca Romijn makes you say: I know! I'll dress her like a chicken! ?

I broke my belly and the doctor put it in a sling.
Does this model look happy???

Also on the chopping block was Mitchell, who should've had a clue his creation was headed down the wrong path when he was able to fit a contestant inside each leg of the shorts he was sewing.
Ra'mon was safe and hopefully learned a lesson about the female form and its various states.
In the end Mitchell stayed and Malvin was sent home.
I know that a lot of folk out there will probably say Malvin should have stayed on the basis (or beleif) that he was a true art-iste with deep philosophical ideas and "conceptual" designs.
But let me ask you this ladies: How many of you want to wear an ugly unflattering outfit with a deep (and I mean do deep, as in buried way way someplace in there) message you will most likely have to explain to everyone who points, giggles and whispers when you enter the room?

...Exactly. Ka-KAW!

I might not care for Mitchell's sloppiness, but the idea behind his design was accessible and current and actually kind of "hip". Had it been properly executed might have even landed him a top spot for the week.

In Mitchell's defense he thought this was also a Survivalist Challenge.
The shorts double as a tent.

PS. My favorite looks were Gordana's and Irina's.

LIZ LANGE, you've nothing to worry about!

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